The move was emotional for everyone. We would have preferred to not have to orchestrate this move to comply with the mandate by the retirement community, but all of our attempts leading up to this action failed. Our parents did not understand or were unable to accept the changes that needed to happen. For all of their promises that they would never put us in the position their parent’s placed them, we wish it had been as tame as the situations they faced with their parents. Their dual dementia’s made this situation so much worse.
Now that they are in Assisted Living, for the next few days, my siblings and I planned on going radio silent. We were facing the need to clean up and dispose of my parent’s townhouse, and their apartment in the retirement community. We needed to let the retirement community pick up where we left off.
For the past year, I received many phone calls from my parents. They always felt like a cry for help, and when I would show up to help I would typically be dismissed. My mom would never remember why she called and what she said on the phone call. I would cycle through periods where I just stopped answering the phone. Our test if this is working is to see how many calls I will receive (or not).
Within the first few days I have not heard from my parents or the retirement community. I’m actually looking forward to visiting my parents in a few days. Liberated.